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Alfred and Constance, Fortitude Valley

Take a dash of Hawaiian smaltz, a truck load of garage sale finds, quirky Queensland humour, lots of piggie goodness and combine with desserts to die for and you've got one of the latest additions to Brisbane's dining and bar scene.

It's been a long time coming but Damien Griffiths has really done himself proud.

From the outside you might wonder what all the fuss is about. The place still looks like the Queensland-style cottages that have always been tucked next door to Limes Hotel in Fortitude Valley.

But walk inside and a world of wonderment awaits.  It's hard to know when to stop looking at the eclectic decor and start focussing on the food, but you will find your way. Designed by Alexander Lotersztain, who also had a hand in Limes Hotel, the fit out will surprise you with something new to discover on every visit.

There's six areas to enjoy here -

The Vanguard Beer Garden

If you are looking for a feed this is a good place to start.  Check out the whole suckling pig in the huge wood fired oven which head chef David Lindesay told me takes three and a half hours to cook.

It's a hard to choose from the gastro pub style menu which revives so many old faves so maybe work your way through.  I started with an authentic 70s style prawn cocktail which my dad would have liked (yes dad, they got the cocktail sauce recipe just right).  He also would have lined up for the bowl of salted pork cracking.

K2 fed his inner man with a roast pork roll which he enjoyed but he wanted more sauce - just the way he rolls. He also shared some of my devils on horseback (prunes wrapped in some very tasty bacon.) 

Hard to say what I liked best but the chorizo scotched egg was certainly memorable for all the right reasons.

The menu here was designed by Jocelyn Hancock (formerly of Jocelyn's Provisions) and David Lindesay.

Alfred's Cafe

Like most things at Alfred and Constance this cafe looks simple until you realise the organic soft serve smoothies can be boozy.  Try a Coconut Mojito with soft serve yoghurt, coconut milk, Malibu Rum, dark chocolate liquor, coconut chocolate and pineapple along with your late night dessert.

By day this spot masquerades as a cosy coffee nook with plenty of tasty pastries.

White Lightning Tiki Bar


Can't decide what to drink here?  Just spin the wheel and let it decide for you.  I love the real pineapples used for the Pina Colada.  They hollow out the inside of the pineapple to make a container for the drink and use the pineapple pulp in the mix along with aged rum and house cream of coconut.

There's a couple of outdoor areas, complete with folding chairs and umbrellas. This whole area is available for private functions and would be awesome for a party.

New York bartending legend Richard Boccato trained up the team to operate with New York snappy style.

Hemmingway Room 


Release your inner Ernest in this room but refrain from playing the piano please. There's a definite Queensland tropical ambience here.

The Black Room


Got to say I'm slightly intimidated by this room and it's cabinet contents are sure to provoke interesting dinner table discussion.  You are warned!

Alfred and Constance

Bottom line:  Wake up Brisbane! You ain't seen anything like Alfred and Constance before.

Best tip: Spend over $25 and Alfred and Constance will cover your parking at Valley Metro Car Park, which is just as well as otherwise I would recommend walking there.

Kerry Heaney

Disclaimer: E,d+bK paid for this meal but took advantage of the free parking offer.


  1. Steph Lawrence10:31 am

    This look incredible! I have been waiting for your post on this to see the pics (saw a sneak peek on Facebook)... will definitely be making a trip to Alfred & Constance over the coming weeks to check it out for myself!

  2. Thanks for the comment Steph.

    It's worth a look and plenty to enjoy if you love retro food and classics. My kinda place.

  3. Anonymous1:55 pm

    All hail the Devils on Horseback! As a 70s party favourite for my suburban family, its time for them to have a "comeback". Maybe now the Gen Ys I invited to a patio party last year will understand what they are.

    Great post Kerri. Can't wait to check out A&C

    1. I'm taking Devils on Horseback to a retro themed luncheon soon. We are supposed to be drinking retro themed grog as well - bring out the Blue Nun! (or maybe not:)

      They were delicious devils with really good thick bacon and thick, plump prunes...

  4. Cottontails3:12 pm

    Are those dangly things in the black room what I think they are? Nearly choked on my coffee!

    1. I think it is what is known as 'anatomically correct'. Imagine dining on bangers and mash opposite that!

      Please do not confuse this with the retro theme for Dame Als.

    2. Cottontails3:54 pm

      Snort! Just lost my composure again. I thought this blog was PG?

    3. It is PG = politically general, perfectly great, pristine goodness
      All of the above but I still love a laugh.

  5. anatomically correct for men who think with...? Most of the ones I've seen were below the kidneys so obviously I don't get around enough. I need to go back to anatomy school. I'd love this place. :)

    1. Perhaps this should be the venue for our food bloggers catch up so you can see this in the flesh - so to speak?

  6. Ooh thanks for the peek into Alfred and Constance, Kerry! I have just landed back from my overseas trip and can't wait to get in there to check it out ; )

    1. Did you see anything like this in your travels Celeste?


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