Cafe crimes! Five things that bug me about cafes

My breakfast arrives and it looks perfect. Lightly poached eggs with runny centres atop crisp corn fritters with a side of smokey bacon, but where's the plate?

Instead of a clean white plate, breakfast is on a wooden board, the latest trend in cafe culture.  It looks attractive but what about the hygiene?  How many runny eggs have seeped into the porous wooden surface?

These bits of wood can't go through a high temperature dishwasher so how do they keep them clean and germ free?  I'm pretty sure they are not bleaching the tens of planks used in a cafe each day.

No problem if the board is used as a platter to serve sandwiches or food that's not likely to run into the wood but definitely not eggs that you will have to mop up off the surface.

So here are five things that bug me about cafes.  Add in yours in the comments below.

1. Wooden boards as plates

See above.

2. Tables too close together
If I have to turn sideways to walk between your tables, they are too close together. I don't want to hear the person next to me eating their food unless they are related to me, ever.

3. Jars used as glasses
It's trendy but it's just not nice.  Drinking from a thin lipped glass feels better and it's easier to appreciate the flavours of the contents. And you can't convince me those jars with the mug handles are recycled, even if there's a paper straw involved.

4. Undisclosed onion
Onion should not be the silent partner to every sandwich, the secret ingredient in every salad and the garnish on every hamburger.  If it is, please include it in the menu description and give me an onion-free option.  That includes red onion too.

5. Mean and mingy cutlery
I know cost is always a factor at cafes and restaurants, but when the cutlery is so thin it hurts my hands to cut, I'm not impressed.  Please spend just a little more and get some decent cutlery that feels good in your hand.

The Sofitel's Prive 249 has the most divine black and gold cutlery.

Disclaimer:  Ed+bK is just having a rant.